Grief, Homestead, Housecrafts, Marriage, Motherhood
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Why :: Write


I had a recent conversation with someone I love & respect, and in this conversation I was being prodded and challenged to consider why I write what I write. I was taken aback that my loved one didn’t understand the backbone of my writings. It was jarring to me and I’ve taken a backseat to think things through. Why DO I blog? What am I trying to convey to readers? What do I care about in my own life? Why do I verbalize the raw parts of my life?


So, I’ll share my journal notes to myself about why I blog and then you can comment about what you think of it. How’s that? Discussion is good. Feedback is good. Sometimes I feel like I’m just blogging out into the void, but then some of you write to me privately about your own stories and your own inspirations. That means a lot to me. I think that most of the time I write for therapeutic reasons and as a form of artistic outlet, but I choose to live as an open-book, allowing others to peer into my mind and heart.


Here’s my summary statement about the content of my blog- I write about my life as a wife & mother (1), creative-soul (2), worshipper of God (3), sufferer & sojourner (4).

  1. For me, being a wife & mother means being a student of life itself. I try to mull over daily life incidences and what I’m learning from them; I read self-help books and autobiographies and novels and historical accounts and blogger’s thoughts to help round-out my own perspective of how to live; I comb through the Bible and attend church and listen to Christian speakers as inspiration for doing life well. So, I like to blog about this journey and the things I discover as a wife & mother.
  2. I can’t call myself an artist, because I currently make no living from doing any of it, but I dabble in learning the guitar, working with watercolor paints, and I intend to create my own home business as a potter of clay. These things are all a work in progress, and I currently don’t have much to show for it, but I find that I have to be creative & pursue art in order to process life and myself and God. So, now and then you’ll see posts about my creative endeavors.
  3. Even though I say damn & shit sometimes, I don’t mean to be crude or demeaning about life in Christ; I’m trying to be real about the rawness of walking with God this side of heaven. I worshipped God before my daughter Heidi died, and now I worship him in a whole new way. Before the devastation of death, I worshipped God with a simplistic trust- I took him at face value and I lived my life reasonably; but now I worship God with a fierce faith- I’m completely vulnerable with him, I’m loud & obnoxious at times, and I’m insistent about relationships & community in Christ. So, I like to post about being a worshipper of God and what that looks like from a wounded, torn, conflicted yet courageous perspective.
  4. Point number 3 hinges on point number 4 of why I write what I write. I’m not afraid to talk about death, grief, trauma, pain, suffering, sadness, loss, devastation. In fact, I’d like to write about being a sufferer and sojourner more. It seems to me that this is a fact of life- there are trials and there are many for ALL of us humans. Some of us get hit over the head again and again; some of us are dealt a blow that blasts us; and others of us stumble along at a snail’s pace. But we all suffer and we all sojourn. That’s the camaraderie and the story we share. So, I like to blog about the real stuff of life, the stuff that makes us think and feel and wonder and pursue. 


I share pictures in my posts not to make you think that everything is smiles, beauty, and success (because it’s not). Rather, I share pictures to add realism, warmth, color, and light to the bones of what I write. I want be alive, to come off the screen, to be sharing coffee with you, to be walking this road alongside of you. If I share what I really see and what I really think, it puts the things of life into meaning and reality and dimension. Sharing pictures also helps me journal, therapeutically digest & absorb, the simple things that keep me going. You know what I mean?

So there you have it, loved ones & friends & visitors. That’s why I have a blog, that’s why I write what I write, that’s why I let my life be an open-book 💙


Follow along on Instagram, Facebook, and this personal website 💫


-BBM

2 Comments

  1. Luanne Donato says

    Dear Cari Jean, From one mother to another, and friend to friend, I Am Glad that You Write. Your words are a healing balm to hurting mothers. Loss comes in many forms. You are a beautiful soul, who has only grown more and more beautiful as life goes on. As long as I have known you, you have been open and honest, kind and caring. Your honestly and raw truth resonates with all ages. Thank you and may God continue to bless and keep you in His loving arms. Luanne

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