All posts tagged: family

Parenting: Tips & Tricks

I’ve been thinking this morning about some of the tips & tricks of parenting that were modeled & taught to me the years before I became a parent. I’m no expert on parenting, obviously, being at the beginning of my journey. But I appreciate those who’ve shared their stories of trials, failures & triumphs with me. I try to think of the bigger picture and life principles as I build into my family. I’m surely not always good at that. But hey, what else can you do as a parent than put your best foot forward?  My mom (one of my many role-models) is in her 70s and, boy, does she have some pearls of wisdom (raised three boys and a girl, how could she not!). She’s one of those that’s made herself a student of life, and when we were kids she made herself a student of early childhood development. In my opinion, that’s a subject she’s well-versed in and can share a good deal of wisdom about. Something simple she taught me concerning …

The Mama Diaries 

I’ve been mulling over the coming new year and what that means to me as a mom. What it means to me as Everley’s mom. Naturally, I think about the new shoes and outfits she’ll be able to wear; the dresses I bought her when she was tiny and she probably won’t fit them till this summer; the dolls she’ll play with more than she does now and the skills she’ll discover the more she plays; the bigger smiles and the louder giggles that she’s sure to produce; the adventures we’ll take together on play dates and family vacations… It will be a whole new year of exciting discovery with EveyMarie, and I am ready! More than just the fun stuff… I’m mulling over what I want her to know about the world around her, even at this early age, and what I want her to understand about herself and others.  One simple little thing that I’ve been noticing lately in our interactions – which does have to do with the world, herself, and others- …

Through: the Forest

You know that phrase, “seeing the trees through the forest”? We referred to it often when I was a Vision Therapist. Sometimes we are so focused on the tree in front of us and the tree to our left and the tree to our right that we become overwhelmed… as a result we’ve lost perspective and we’ve gotten lost in the forest of trees. We’re no longer seeing the trees that make up the whole forest. (In Vision Therapy this is known as central focus and parafieral awareness 😉)  The holiday season for us is much like this phenamanon. We tend to just see all the trees -sadness, despair, loss, misery- and no forest -God who is sovereign over these emotions. Or we see a thick dense forest of pain and anger that will consume us and we miss the individual trees of blessing and hope.  It is difficult to explain to those who have not suffered during the holiday season how much resentment, turmoil, and bitterness is wrapped up under the cheer, lights, ornaments, …

a Fair Story

This time last year we were reeling from Everley’s sudden birth, still grappling with Heidi’s sudden passing just seven months prior, knocking holes in our bedroom walls to make room for a bassinet, and grasping for breath in the midst of crises and change and chaos.  My body felt like it’d been hit by a Mack truck after the caesarean and  I was still being wheeled to the NICU two weeks postpartum.    So we decided to go to the Fair. “What?” Yes. It sounds dramatic because it was kind of dramatic.  But we were desperate to do something normal, to spend time just the two of us, to let our worries go, to relax and blend into a crowd. We’d had tickets to a country concert at the county fair. We got the green light from nurses and doctors who were overseeing Everley, and though some said I’d never make it up the grand stand because I was still too weak, I not only made it…. I climbed (hobbled actually) to the very top.  …

Dogs: Lick, Love & Learn

For those of you who know me well, BleuBird Mama loves her dogs! The funny thing is that I didn’t grow up with dogs, not even a house cat, and the little goldfish lived about two days. I had no experience with animals until I was in college. I liked other people’s pets, but I didn’t know how to interact with them well. I also didn’t understand the context of a species and their particular behaviors. I always knew- even when I was a kid- that I’d marry an animal lover. My husband told me he wouldn’t have married me if I didn’t love animals. He grew up with Labradors and outdoor cats in the mountainside of a pacific coastal town, so he was all outdoorsy and acclimated in ways this wimpy suburban girl was not.  When we got married we inherited Ian’s old black lab Luke Skywalker, also known as Pookie or Lucus Maximus and Pook-pook-pookie-the-pooper. He was a wonderful dog. Loyal as the day is long. Simple minded. Obedient. Affectionate. Quiet. Sweet. Of …

Honesty: Grief & Trauma

You know that old adage- “Honesty is the best policy”? Well, sometimes I wonder if we’re truly honest with ourselves. Are we truly honest enough about our own frustrations, failures, and fears to… change? Change what, you might be wondering…. Three and a half years ago when my husband and I got married, we would never have imagined we’d face the hardships we’ve experienced. Not only do we have opposite personalities, we also come from very different upbringings, and we have very different interests; every newly married couple has to work at understanding each other, but add to our scenario the fact that my husband was gone (military training) more than he was home the first two years of our marriage. We didn’t have time to get to know each other, to invest in one another, to build a life together. The tension was mounting between us, but we had our first unplanned baby on the way. And then she suddenly died a few days after she was born. We were already disconnected – add to that …

VB // BBM Story

Hey there readers, Some of you, I’m sure, have wondered how Bleubird Earthen came about. Well, here’s the story! Straight from me, the BleuBird Mama! If we haven’t met before, enjoy your cup of tea with me, friend 🙂 This is just a ten minute recording of why I started this blog and what I’d like to be sharing with you in my posts. I explain the process of becoming a potter and other topics of my life that I blog about as seen listed on my main content page. If you’d like to view a few pieces I did over the past year of learning the trade you can see those here at “Pottery: First Fruits.” Yesterday I wrote a bit about the struggles of the past three years and why I savor the beauty and grace in the aftermath of deep suffering, so this video post follows up on that previous post, which you can see here “Our Story: Uprooted to Grounded.” By the way, I don’t mention it in the recording, but I do …

Balloons: Up to Heaven

This time last year we attended our daughter’s memorial service. Exactly one week after I had given birth to her, a glorious event, we were celebrating her glorious homegoing. It was too poignant for words. A day I will never forget and full of bittersweetness. Ian and I felt then that the ceremony gave us some closure. The memorial service was so well executed – the 90s Christian music playlist I had organized for the prelude, the lavender ribbons and bows like her nursery that adorned the sanctuary, the numerous pictures of her precious face in the church foyer, the heartfelt messages Ian and I shared with the congregation, the powerful pastoral teaching from the scriptures about Hope and grieving well, the prayers and poems and lullabies shared by family members, the hugs and kind words of so many dear people – we felt uplifted and at peace beyond understanding. But that warm feeling blew away as the chilly winter winds swept in. By late November we were struggling to just get out of bed …