All posts filed under: Motherhood

Potter :: Mama

I’ve scrounged up the time -in the business of motherhood and life itself- to throw on my wheel, which is located in a corner of my parents’ basement. They live in the suburbs of this area just six minutes from my place out in the country. Eventually, we have plans of building here on our property a studio for me, one large enough for my work but also for the kids to hang out in. Until then…. I intermittently have opportunities to work in my makeshift studio that butts up to my dad’s office (what he always dreamed of- having his married daughter come back home to work in his office space 😉 ) I’ve been thinking to myself about my work as a potter and my work a mother. I love both jobs. I have a passion for them both. I have a passion for a lot of other things as well such as public speaking, Vision Therapy, brain development, and watercolor painting. But for now, at this stage of my life, I’ve picked …

Kids: Don’t Keep

I’m the sort of mom, whether it’s positive or negative, who likes to get things done- finish that pile of laundry, clean up the bathroom, do my Bible study, take the trash out, go for a walk outside- keep on truckin! But that just wasn’t happening this morning. I tried getting to my list, but my toddler kept getting in the way. “Want to wash hands, Mama!” “I need a snack, Mama!” “I want to wash Silky, Mama!” “Help, Mama!” Inside this was me: 🙄😑😖😤☹️😩 That list just wasn’t happening and being a Homemaker was right out the window with the window-washing (that I haven’t done…. like, ever). I stopped in my tracks and asked myself, “What have the voices of wisdom told me about parenting?” I heard from my mind’s memory box my former pastor’s wife tell me that when she finally had children after years of waiting that she was ready to have her life turned upside down and that she enjoyed every minute of raising three boys; I heard my longtime family …

Parenting :: Waters

Manly and I had a good teaching moment as parents. We learned something about ourselves and humanity. And about what not to do next time…. It was freezing cold outside so we thought it’d be fun to swim at the hotel pool where Nana & Papa were staying, and Everley talks about her memories of the beach often. Win Win right? Not exactly… Thinking that she was excited about jumping in the pool with Mama & Daddy, we did just that- we jumped in! And to her dismay, the water was kind of chilly. So we sang a song and did a dance to make things exciting 😀 Bad idea. Being wound up in the positive just got her more wound up in the negative. Manly finally lifted her out of the pool because she seemed truly frightened of being in the pool. What did that result in? A sopping wet, bedraggled toddler screaming in agony that she didn’t want to be in the water or away from her daddy. It was a rather sad …

My: Christmas Gift

The Christmas gift that God had in the works last Christmas. Having another baby wasn’t on my wish list. I’m amazed when I look at him now, snuggled up by our tree. Last year was SO hard. I felt like I was reliving two of my nightmares all over again- losing Heidi and almost losing Everley. I just didn’t know what to do with myself- all my fears and all that pain. But Christ has prevailed with his plans yet again. I am grateful. From the bottom of my heart I am grateful that he’s carried me and that he’s given such a dear gift to treasure 🎁 Jesus is the reason for the season. -BBM

Little Bear :: Birth Story

Part 1: I rediscovered these pictures taken by my husband just a few hours after our son’s home birth. There’s more to the story, but the gist here is that Gatlin (Little Bear) was born very fast- like lightening speed fast- and as a result had a hard time waking up to his new surroundings… My Midwife wanted to see him nurse, but he wasn’t giving that sort of enthusiastic response, so she called our pediatrician and discussed over the phone how to proceed. They decided together to have him further evaluated at the local hospital… Our pediatrician has been so good to our family since the loss of our Heidi. He understands us very well and is always encouraging. He met my husband and Midwife at the hospital and discussed the lab results with the ER doc; in the end, our pediatrician said with a twinkle in his eye, “Well, he could stay here over night, but none of you can nurse him! Best for him to be home where he belongs.”  Two great …

Happy Birthday, Sugar

Oh, Sugar. Oh, Honey-Bunches-of-Oats. You’ve been the cream in my coffee all year long. What a delightful year it was.  Your one year birthday celebration was a smash hit with about 60 people here to commemorate your special life and to rejoice in God’s good gifts to this family. All are smitten with you- your infectious smile and almond shaped eyes and thick eyebrows and rosy cheeks and endearing little voice.  At your birthday last year you were just a crawler and the “Nap Queen,” so your jammies say. Truly, you were delightful every day with your amiable disposition, fascination with the world around you, satisfied little laugh, and seemingly perceptive sense of humor.  After your birthday bash, you and I had a quiet month of September at home, attending story hour at the library, baking goodies, making friends. Then we had a whirlwind of October on our trip to Aunti Gina’s in Newport Beach followed by a two week separation for the anniversary HI trip when you stayed home with GaGa & Mongie (as …

Dear :: Son

Happy due date, Dear Son.  You’ve been given it to your Mama easy, Bud, and I gotta thank you for it. You’re my first “normal” baby- your sisters both had traumatic events, whether leaving or entering, and so far with you it’s been a nice flow and fairly predictable. You’re a quiet little fella who doesn’t cry much or for long and you seem pretty content hanging by yourself when you need to. It’s probably tougher being an infant than most of us think, considering you can’t do anything for yourself. I imagine that when you fuss and hear me whisper in your ear, “It’s okay, Bud. Mama’s got you” that you relax and know you’re cared for; I imagine that when I scoop you up and hold you close that you feel safe and understood; I imagine that when I wipe your bum and then finish the job with kisses on your cheeks and gentle words that you know all is done in love and that the unpleasant things aren’t a threat; I imagine …

from Thin :: to Fat

This is one of those awkward times in life. I look in the mirror and I wonder, “Who’s that??” I’ve always been tall and thin, classic with a bit of flare, fair skinned and peachy, unwilling to be a model or make too much of my looks. But being pregnant with my third in three years has changed my physique so much that I’m like, “Whoa. I look fat. I never ever thought I would look like this.” Some of you are like, “Welcome to the club, sister. It’s called womanhood.”Okay, yes, I agree with you. I find myself pep-talking. “It is a privilege to be pregnant. It’s a privilege to carry this son of ours. It’s okay to go through changes. It’s okay to feel different. Life is full of flux. This is one stage of many fluctuating parts of life. Just roll with it.” (pun intended) I look at pictures of myself from just nine months ago when my husband and I had the delightful fourth anniversary trip to Hawaii. Where did that …

Why :: Write

I had a recent conversation with someone I love & respect, and in this conversation I was being prodded and challenged to consider why I write what I write. I was taken aback that my loved one didn’t understand the backbone of my writings. It was jarring to me and I’ve taken a backseat to think things through. Why DO I blog? What am I trying to convey to readers? What do I care about in my own life? Why do I verbalize the raw parts of my life? So, I’ll share my journal notes to myself about why I blog and then you can comment about what you think of it. How’s that? Discussion is good. Feedback is good. Sometimes I feel like I’m just blogging out into the void, but then some of you write to me privately about your own stories and your own inspirations. That means a lot to me. I think that most of the time I write for therapeutic reasons and as a form of artistic outlet, but I …

Parenting: Tips & Tricks

I’ve been thinking this morning about some of the tips & tricks of parenting that were modeled & taught to me the years before I became a parent. I’m no expert on parenting, obviously, being at the beginning of my journey. But I appreciate those who’ve shared their stories of trials, failures & triumphs with me. I try to think of the bigger picture and life principles as I build into my family. I’m surely not always good at that. But hey, what else can you do as a parent than put your best foot forward?  My mom (one of my many role-models) is in her 70s and, boy, does she have some pearls of wisdom (raised three boys and a girl, how could she not!). She’s one of those that’s made herself a student of life, and when we were kids she made herself a student of early childhood development. In my opinion, that’s a subject she’s well-versed in and can share a good deal of wisdom about. Something simple she taught me concerning …